Tag Archives: pumpkin war

STOP HELPING!

You don’t understand what I’ve been going through. I haven’t been sleeping. I now own thirteen Ronco Vegetable Poachers because I have formed an intimate and personal relationship with the Australian guy who sells them at three in the morning. I … Continue reading

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A Loving Exchange.

This conversation happened today as we were driving to some friends’ to celebrate their daughter’s first birthday. Me: Why are you going this way? Himself: I want to finally see this house with the pumpkins. Me: It’s not on this … Continue reading

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The Assault

I’ve been formulating a plan. It’s taken me a few weeks to work out the details, but I’ve finally got it. It’s going to take cunning, guile, and I’ll be honest. Not all of you are going to make it. … Continue reading

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Just call me Sybil.

That’s brilliant, isn’t it? I can barely get people to remember that I’m not called Martha. So that’s just what we need. More names. I, dear readers, am a study in contrasts. You could say I’m deep…conflicted. Torn between extremes … Continue reading

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Not Taking this Lying Down

Because if I do, a pumpkin might fall on my head. So I have this… Which serves the two-fold purpose of Halloweening up our house and irritating the cats. And then we have this… A little fruit salad, anyone? And … Continue reading

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Pumpkin Grief

I mentioned last week that my nightmare of a neighbor* (not Backyard Neighbor) lined her roofline with pumpkins and that this was CLEARLY a call to arms. A summons, if you will. Calling me out as surely as if she’d … Continue reading

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Oh, It’s On

I drove home from work Tuesday. Tired, ready to relax. Desperately in need of some down time. Which might have involved wine. Possibly. Nothing in a paper bag. Or box. Quit with the judging. I made the final turn into … Continue reading

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